Not So Fast Dubinsky

Old joke.  A navy official has been reprimanded for being insensitive to sailors when he has to relay bad news. He has been particularly insensitive when informing sailors that a parent has passed away.  Having been so scolded, the next time the admiral has to tell a sailor that a parent has died he promises to be more diplomatic.  A few days later, the admiral is notified that Albert Dubinsky's mother has died.  The admiral gets on the horn and calls for "all Hands on deck."  When the sailors arrive he relays the sad news the following way.

"All those who have mothers who are still alive, take one step forward...Not so fast Dubinsky."

On Friday I had my stress test to ensure the cardiologist that I was healthy enough to go through with hip surgery. The cardiologist had, upon examining me in his office, said that I was likely "home free."  I felt fine on the stress test.  However, when I got home there was a note from the cardiologist indicating that there was a mild irregularity and that I need to take another more sophisticated test.

This stunned me. I feel great and figured that I would get the kosher go-ahead. And, also, this was precisely what occurred prior to my first surgery. An irregularity caused another cardiologist to suggest another test.  That time the second test indicated a problem. This time, though, the doc emphasized that the irregularity was mild and that, in his words, there was nothing "at all" alarming about the results.

Still it was jarring news.  I did not get the it is "not at all alarming" correspondence until Saturday morning. So Friday night was not joyful.  

I'm fine now. Had some more exchanges with the doc yesterday and he knows I am going away for a week. (Again precisely the scenario as last time when I had the equivocal results. Then, as now, I was heading for Florida for a week and had the second test when I returned). The doc is not concerned and even suggested I might stay off a medication I've been taking for two years which you take if you have a problem.  And I walked my five miles yesterday and did not feel anything approaching pain or shortness of breath.

Still Friday evening was a "not so fast Dubinsky" moment.  I have a friend who is dying. We all are of course, but she has only weeks or days left.  I've had contemporaries leaving us with sobering regularity.  I do not want to join the parade.  (I was so fakakt on Friday night that I went to make sure I had declared my beneficiaries accurately on the accounts I have).

Count your blessings. I figure I have twenty more years to go at this ultimate amusement park. Seize the day.